To my daughters.
To my daughters. I want you to know this. To really know, that you have marked my soul with yours. That you are so very loved, with a raw kind of love that runs so deep in my veins and through the very core of what makes me me - a love that you can't possibly understand until you are a mother yourself.
Ever since we became mother and daughter my life became infinitely harder, yet in the same instant, infinitely better. Parenting is not easy, anyone that tells you otherwise is on something mood altering. No, parenting is not easy, just as most things in life that are worth doing. There are some days when I would love nothing more than to hide in my room with a book, a bourbon and some chocolate, while I let you two fend for yourselves. There are days when you get on my nerves and I wish that you would just be quiet. But there are also days and moments when I could burst with pride and happiness when I look at you. When I enjoy playing monopoly with you or chatting with you about your day or watching you dance or sing or play sport. When I truly appreciate how lucky I am to get to be the one that guides you through your early years, and the one that watches you grow into the people you will become. I'm so lucky that I'm the One who you want to be close to when you hurt yourself, or need help with something.
I love that you are part me and part of your dad. To me it is the ultimate gift your father has given me - a chance to be a mother. And while I love the fact that you are special to me because you symbolize a bond between me and your dad, I also know that all children are special to their mothers. whether they share a blood line or not. That we would lay down our life for you. Fight for you, protect and nurture you and always try to do right by you.
I wanted to use this page as a way of telling you that you are loved. And to give you some advice that might help you navigate your way through your life in a way that is meaningful. You've given me so much, so here is something small in return. Parts of this will be amusing. Parts you will understand now, and others you will understand when you are older. Some of this advice I've completely plagiarized. Some are from me. Okay, most are probably plagiarized. I'm only 30 so I've not yet developed the wisdom I require for this task.
Which leads in nicely to number one.
#1 When you're a teenager you think you know it all and that you are making sane, adult choices. Let me be clear on this one. You're not. I'm not trying to be condescending. It's just the way it is. Your hormones are all over the place, convincing you to act a little (or total bat shit) crazy. Please remember this darlings. Your. parents. know. more. than. you. do. And when we rub that fact in your face, just remember that, hold it in, and save it for when you have your own children.
#2 Eat with your mouth closed. I tell you this all of the time. This is just a reminder. No one wants to see the food in your mouth.
#3 Cultivate your friendships. Take care of your friends and they'll take care of you. Remember it is more important to be kind than right.
#4 Be kind to your sister. It will most likely be the longest relationship you will have in your lifetime.
#5 Know that you will make mistakes. It's part of being human. Learn from them.
#6 Remember that everybody else is human. Therefore they make mistakes too. Don't hold a grudge sweetie. It is not worth it and you risk your own happiness more than theirs.
#7 What you are is what you have been, and what you will be is what you do now. So keep reading and learning. Eat well, find a way to be active that you enjoy and do it often.
#8 If you find yourself feeling awkward in a social situation don't reach for a drink. Instead, find that person that is alone and feeling just as awkward as you and go and talk to them. I'm not saying that you should never drink. I'm just saying that it's an important skill to learn to engage with strangers without the ol' dutch courage.
#9 Look people in the eye when you are talking to them. They will know that you are really listening.
#10 Harping back to number 8. Don't drink to make yourself feel better. Only drink to make yourself feel EVEN better. In case I'm not being clear enough here: Alcohol is a depressant. Using it to feel better, especially as a young adult is not a good idea.
#11 Speaking of depressants. If you find yourself feeling depressed TALK TO SOMEONE. It doesn't have to be me. I've battled with depression most of my life so I know what it is to fight the black dog. It IS a battle and it is one that you CAN overcome.
#12 Find a way of self expression. Art, music, comedy, dance, running. Find something that makes you feel like you.
#13 Be who you are and who you want to be. Gay? All good. Christian? What ever floats your boat. There are many things that define us. You are not just one thing. Don't hold onto labels too tightly. As long as you strive to be good and kind. Be conscious of the fact that we are all equal and different and beautiful.
#14 Don't waste your time on superstition. There are more important things in life. You will not receive 7 years bad luck if you break a mirror or walk under a ladder. Throwing salt over your left shoulder won't scare away the devil and a black cat is just an adorable creature in need of love. And while I'm at it don't judge people by the month they are born. I am not stubborn because some alignment of the stars or moon tell me I am a bull sign. That's just bull shit. *lol, snort*
which leads to #15...
#15 laugh at loved ones jokes. Even if you've heard it before. It makes us feel good that we made some one laugh. It's wonderful to make others feel good. I think it's one of the keys to happiness. So make others laugh. As long as it isn't at someone expense. Bullying is NOT okay.
#16 I repeat. Bullying is NOT okay. Stick up for others if they are being bullied. Stick up for yourself if you are being bullied. And for the love of god, if I find out you bullied someone...so help me...
Over kill? Maybe. Except you could expect me to unleash angry mamma bear on anyone who bullies my babies, so I guess the same goes to you two. Do I make myself clear?
On this note, I shall finish dispensing my advice like a maniacal pharmacist and leave you with this joke I enjoy:
"A Yogi walked into The Zen Pizza Parlour. "Make me one with everything.' said the Yogi. When the Yogi got the pizza, he gave the shopkeeper a $20 note. the shopkeeper put the note into his pocket. The Yogi said 'Don't I get change?' The shopkeeper replied, 'Change must come from within." (see #15)
I love you babies. Always and forever. Happy mothers day to me :)
xxx
Ever since we became mother and daughter my life became infinitely harder, yet in the same instant, infinitely better. Parenting is not easy, anyone that tells you otherwise is on something mood altering. No, parenting is not easy, just as most things in life that are worth doing. There are some days when I would love nothing more than to hide in my room with a book, a bourbon and some chocolate, while I let you two fend for yourselves. There are days when you get on my nerves and I wish that you would just be quiet. But there are also days and moments when I could burst with pride and happiness when I look at you. When I enjoy playing monopoly with you or chatting with you about your day or watching you dance or sing or play sport. When I truly appreciate how lucky I am to get to be the one that guides you through your early years, and the one that watches you grow into the people you will become. I'm so lucky that I'm the One who you want to be close to when you hurt yourself, or need help with something.
I love that you are part me and part of your dad. To me it is the ultimate gift your father has given me - a chance to be a mother. And while I love the fact that you are special to me because you symbolize a bond between me and your dad, I also know that all children are special to their mothers. whether they share a blood line or not. That we would lay down our life for you. Fight for you, protect and nurture you and always try to do right by you.
I wanted to use this page as a way of telling you that you are loved. And to give you some advice that might help you navigate your way through your life in a way that is meaningful. You've given me so much, so here is something small in return. Parts of this will be amusing. Parts you will understand now, and others you will understand when you are older. Some of this advice I've completely plagiarized. Some are from me. Okay, most are probably plagiarized. I'm only 30 so I've not yet developed the wisdom I require for this task.
Which leads in nicely to number one.
#1 When you're a teenager you think you know it all and that you are making sane, adult choices. Let me be clear on this one. You're not. I'm not trying to be condescending. It's just the way it is. Your hormones are all over the place, convincing you to act a little (or total bat shit) crazy. Please remember this darlings. Your. parents. know. more. than. you. do. And when we rub that fact in your face, just remember that, hold it in, and save it for when you have your own children.
#2 Eat with your mouth closed. I tell you this all of the time. This is just a reminder. No one wants to see the food in your mouth.
#3 Cultivate your friendships. Take care of your friends and they'll take care of you. Remember it is more important to be kind than right.
#4 Be kind to your sister. It will most likely be the longest relationship you will have in your lifetime.
#5 Know that you will make mistakes. It's part of being human. Learn from them.
#6 Remember that everybody else is human. Therefore they make mistakes too. Don't hold a grudge sweetie. It is not worth it and you risk your own happiness more than theirs.
#7 What you are is what you have been, and what you will be is what you do now. So keep reading and learning. Eat well, find a way to be active that you enjoy and do it often.
#8 If you find yourself feeling awkward in a social situation don't reach for a drink. Instead, find that person that is alone and feeling just as awkward as you and go and talk to them. I'm not saying that you should never drink. I'm just saying that it's an important skill to learn to engage with strangers without the ol' dutch courage.
#9 Look people in the eye when you are talking to them. They will know that you are really listening.
#10 Harping back to number 8. Don't drink to make yourself feel better. Only drink to make yourself feel EVEN better. In case I'm not being clear enough here: Alcohol is a depressant. Using it to feel better, especially as a young adult is not a good idea.
#11 Speaking of depressants. If you find yourself feeling depressed TALK TO SOMEONE. It doesn't have to be me. I've battled with depression most of my life so I know what it is to fight the black dog. It IS a battle and it is one that you CAN overcome.
#12 Find a way of self expression. Art, music, comedy, dance, running. Find something that makes you feel like you.
#13 Be who you are and who you want to be. Gay? All good. Christian? What ever floats your boat. There are many things that define us. You are not just one thing. Don't hold onto labels too tightly. As long as you strive to be good and kind. Be conscious of the fact that we are all equal and different and beautiful.
#14 Don't waste your time on superstition. There are more important things in life. You will not receive 7 years bad luck if you break a mirror or walk under a ladder. Throwing salt over your left shoulder won't scare away the devil and a black cat is just an adorable creature in need of love. And while I'm at it don't judge people by the month they are born. I am not stubborn because some alignment of the stars or moon tell me I am a bull sign. That's just bull shit. *lol, snort*
which leads to #15...
#15 laugh at loved ones jokes. Even if you've heard it before. It makes us feel good that we made some one laugh. It's wonderful to make others feel good. I think it's one of the keys to happiness. So make others laugh. As long as it isn't at someone expense. Bullying is NOT okay.
#16 I repeat. Bullying is NOT okay. Stick up for others if they are being bullied. Stick up for yourself if you are being bullied. And for the love of god, if I find out you bullied someone...so help me...
Over kill? Maybe. Except you could expect me to unleash angry mamma bear on anyone who bullies my babies, so I guess the same goes to you two. Do I make myself clear?
On this note, I shall finish dispensing my advice like a maniacal pharmacist and leave you with this joke I enjoy:
"A Yogi walked into The Zen Pizza Parlour. "Make me one with everything.' said the Yogi. When the Yogi got the pizza, he gave the shopkeeper a $20 note. the shopkeeper put the note into his pocket. The Yogi said 'Don't I get change?' The shopkeeper replied, 'Change must come from within." (see #15)
I love you babies. Always and forever. Happy mothers day to me :)
xxx
Comments
Post a Comment